Why don’t these people ever listen ?

Communication is a funny thing isn’t it? On the face of it, it seems so simple. You say something, people hear you ~ and understand.

But do they ??

If you are a manager or team leader, how often have you wondered why your instructions don’t get followed. How come people did not see your email? Did you not explain everything when you popped into the workroom? Did they not understand what you meant when you explained everything at the workshop? It was perfectly clear. Why did people not listen? What is going on here??

What is going on is that there is a big difference between what you say, and what your staff get. Remember the playground game where one person starts a whisper, passes it on through several ears, and the message that comes out the other end is different ~ sometimes wildly so ~ and we all laughed ? Well your staff are unwittingly doing the same thing, often. They are each taking in your communication and putting it through their own set of filters, and jumping to their own conclusions. They are making assumptions.

The sobering thought is that we all do it ~ all the time. Watch television any night of the week and you will see people filtering. It is the basis of any debate that includes phrases like . . . No that is not what I said or I was quoted out of context or I am sorry you put that interpretation on what I said ~ it is not what I intended.

Or think about at home. Oh I thought you were picking him up or Wasn’t it 7pm they were coming? or You said you would pay that bill .

Does it all sound familiar?? We are all filtering, jumping to conclusions, and making assumptions every hour of the day. It is part of life. And it is happening in your library all the time. So what are some of the key impacts, and what can you do about it?

People often look out for information to support their current point of view. If we think someone is not up to the challenge we are inclined to notice things that support that. If we think the project is fraught with difficulty we notice the problems ~ in fact we welcome them! Elements of ~ I told you so ~ flash through our mind. And if we think our communication was real clear, then we expect people to understand it and act on it. Right ?? Wrong !

Your important communication is the trigger for a lot more than understanding and action ~ well at least the understanding and action that you intended. The first thing that often happens is the rumour mill immediately goes into overdrive. Conversations start going on, often in whispers, by the photocopier, in the staff room, in the passage ways ~ and what about the smoking room (if you have one) or the pub or social club on Friday night ? An absolute smorgasbord of assumptions are there for the taking.

And then people start acting on those assumptions. You are going off in one direction assuming everyone is with you, and they are miles behind, or on a different path altogether. Then you start to get the message that all in not well. Some brave soul mentions in passing that maybe some of the troops are feeling just a tad disgruntled. Disgruntled? They are furious, but has anyone mentioned to you? Probably not, and you can’t understand why not, but that is a whole other question.

So what to do? Here are 5 ideas to keep in mind next time you are preparing that important message, whether it be written or verbal

• Think about your audience - who are they – what are they looking for
• What are the key messages you want them to get – get real clear on this - list them - use them to structure what you say or write
• Summarise regularly during your communication – based on the key messages
• Test the take-up rate – get together with a few staff a day or two later and ask them what they think were the key messages you presented – AND avoid talking yourself - just listen to what they tell you. Their feedback is a gift.
• Learn from them – in the interests of giving your customers what they want, use their feedback to better shape your next message.

Learn from them – in the interests of giving your customers what they want, use their feedback to better shape your next message.