Why didn't they tell me ?

In my first column (July 2003) I talked about the challenge of ensuring communication is understood correctly by its intended recipients. I mentioned the fact that often the team leader, supervisor or manager is the last person to know that their message has missed the mark, or somehow been misinterpreted. If you are responsible for heading up a team of staff the thought goes through your mind - Why didn't they tell me ?? I have experienced this feeling myself, often, and so would like to explore some of the factors that can help create a scenario like this. You may like to take a few moments to see if any of them fit your environment.

And just a little note offered with the greatest of respect . . . . If you think none of these apply in your library, then congratulations! But here's a little thought. . . how do you really know? Maybe you have not been told yet. Catch 22 indeed !

So here are four likely scenarios that often result in the person who most needs to know what is going on, being left right out of the loop . .

Scenario one

Your staff are fearful of your reaction . Anyone who leads and/or manages staff is making an impression every minute of the day. Staff notice things - they notice how you are feeling, how you are looking, how you are saying stuff, how you are responding to their queries and comments. Now you may believe this is simply not true - you are the same every day, and they are making assumptions. Yes they are, and they do and that's the reality. If you remain unconvinced, think about how you judge your CE or senior manager ~ how do you know it is a good time to approach him or her? What info do you use to decide? Your staff do the same with you - tough message, but true.

So when it comes time to give you some tough news, or let you know that all is not well in a particular team, then they are fearful of how you will respond, so no-one is keen to step forward. They leave that mysterious "someone else" to do it.

Scenario two

Your staff think you are too busy. Anyone who works closely with a team leader or manager in a Library notices how much you have to do; they notice the meetings you have to attend, the times you are called away at short notice, the stuff you have to do that seems above and beyond the call of duty.

So when they have some information for you, they notice you being very busy, often feel sorry for you, want to ease the load or protect you, so decide not to bother you. Again, you may believe that you are very open to approach, and have an open door policy, however that is often not what staff notice. So . . . . why didn't they tell me, you wonder.

Scenario three

Your staff misjudge the significance of the issue. This is linked to the one above. In a time when empowerment and initiative are paramount, it is sometimes easy for staff to deal with something themselves, or ignore it, in the genuine belief that they are doing the best thing. They believe at best the problem will solve itself or at worst, disappear. Sometimes this works, and sometimes it doesn't. And if it doesn't then the staff are caught back in (1) and (2) above. Sometimes all too soon you have a crisis on your hands and find yourself wondering ~ Why didn't they tell me?

Scenario four

Your staff can't find quite the right time to tell you. If any of the scenarios above are at least partly true in your library then staff are genuinely perplexed about just how to give you information that you probably need to know. Email is one option but they may find it hard to express what they want to say in an email, and once it's written, then it stays written. They could make a time to come and see you but as mentioned above, they notice you have a lot on, they may see themselves as "not very important", they may be nervous about just how to say what they want to tell you, and what happens if you are not happy about what they have to say? They could bring it up at a team meeting, but what will the others think? What will you think? What happens if they make a fool of themselves ? And besides, they notice that most of the meeting is taken up with stuff the manager or team leader has to tell the staff and there never seems time for other things. So once again the communication doesn't happen. Again, when you finally get to hear, you are a little puzzled about what is going on.

So what to do? My first suggestion is to simply note that these communication blocks are common, happen in most libraries (and organisations and teams and families and relationships ...) and are very solvable, but do take a little time. It takes years for patterns like this to build up in a team - and in a funny kind of way they are comfortable, and known. They become the norm.

What I have found works best happens one person at a time and one communication at a time. It takes energy and time on both sides, as well as a solid commitment to create the sort of working relationship where good news and bad news are all grist to the mill, where honesty and integrity are the order of the day and where the other person knows and really believes that their contribution is welcome and valuable. I will have more suggestions on this next time . . . . .